Saturday, January 12, 2008


Are you sick of this whole “Pre-election Primary B.S.” yet? I am. I’ve had enough of Barack, and Hillary, and Rudy, and Huckabee, and Fred, and “Mac is back!” and all the others.

Barack Obama offers change. From what? If you listen, you’ll realize he never says what he wants to change from. And Hillary? She’s offering “Hope.” The only hope she seems to want is, “Hope I win.”

And don’t get me started on Rudy Giuliani. It seems like he’s got a microchip planted somewhere in that pointy head of his, and every time someone asks him a question, he always brings it back to “9/11.” Think I’m kidding? After getting drubbed in the New Hampshire primary, he was asked if he was worried. The New York Daily News quoted him as saying, “None of this worries me; Sept. 11, there were times I was worried.” What a hose-bag.

But, there is a viable candidate out there who hasn’t declared himself, but can probably win if he runs: New York City’s own mayor, Mike Bloomberg.

Yeah, I know; Nasally, short, Jewish, hella-rich, bureaucrat, kinda geeky. But—and this is a big but—he doesn’t owe anyone, anything. He’s not beholden to big oil, or big business or big tobacco or big fill-in-the-blank. He’s a self-made billionaire (Yeah, with a “B”) who can afford to fund his own campaign for up to a billion dollars, lose, and STILL be a billionaire. Why wouldn’t he run?

One thing Mayor Mike is very good at is delegating. He knows his own shortcomings, and rather than try to be everyman to everyone, he appoints smart, savvy people to leadership positions, and lets them do what they know best. Isn’t that what we need in a leader?

Right now, all the “pundits” (From the Greek for “pinhead”) (OK, not really; I just made that up, but it could be true) are saying he can’t win. Uhhh, yeah, he can.

I was talking with my right-leaning brother the other day about the field of candidates out there. For a change we both agreed that not only do we dislike them all, but we both think Mike might be a good choice. This, from a bleeding-heart liberal and a Reagan Republican!

There’re a few things Mayor Mike needs to do, In My Humble Opinion, and he’s apparently already started. Rumor has it that he’s been commissioning polls nationwide seeing if he has any shot at all. Good start.

Now he needs to build a platform, and start making it known. Most New Yorkers already now he’s pro-choice, anti-tobacco, and wants some gun control to stop the idiots from bringing their handguns into NYC. He just needs to spread the word. Anyone who doesn’t agree with those stances won’t vote for him, so he might as well put it out there so he can see if national polls match up to this own numbers.

He also needs a running mate. I suggest he tap Congressman Ron Paul. If you don’t know anything about him, THIS is a good place to start. The guy’s got some good ideas, and would certainly liven up a so-far dull-as-dishwater race.

Mayor Mike is playing it smart so far. He’s staying out of the primaries, letting the “leaders” knock each other about. When he decides to come in as a third-party choice, most voters will know where their parties’ nominee stands. Mike might well be seen as a refreshing alternative.

It would certainly make for an interesting 2008. And remember this: In a three-way race, he only needs 34% to win. Nice odds.

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